Dust off your bible, break out the rosary beads and get ready for some heavy-handed religious imagery… Lady Gaga’s Judas has arrived!
Unfortunately it’s not in the same bonkers league as her sci-fi vagina epic, Born This Way, but it’s still worth a closer look.
So the theme of this video is 'bikers'... expect plenty of leather jackets, boots, a paunche or two, some questionable personal hygiene and crusty beards.
I'm hazarding a guess that this chap might be Jesus - his crown o' thorns is a dead giveaway.
Say hello to Judas (aka that man from The Walking Dead). He's mean, moody and one of those dangerous, sexy types your mother warned you about.
No-one wants to look at your arse crack John, put it away!
Shakira pops in to provide some much needed Waka Waka.
Loving the semi-ridiculous / semi-amazing choreography. This finger clicking, side-step shuffle is clearly pinched from The Shoop Shoop Song.
Is it any wonder Gaga's got a thing for Judas when Jesus goes around looking this miserable? BLOODY CHEER UP!
Officially the most fascinating bit of string in pop history.
LOOK OUT! Symbolic drenching inbound!
Judas pours a can of beer over Gaga's arse. I'm sceptical this was actually in The Old Testament.
This is Gaga getting a proper biblical stoning. Likely reasons include: that hair, that dress, the Born This Way album artwork.
In conclusion… better than Alejandro, not as good as Bad Romance and probably not worth the church getting their cassocks in a twist over.
Can we get on with the album release now?